My sister told me a soul mate is not the person who makes you the happiest but the one who makes you feel the most, who conducts your heart to bang the loudest, who can drag you giggling with forgiveness from the cellar they locked you in. It has always been you.
August 7th, 2012
You rolled your eyes and looked at your phone when I told you the story about me tripping in the main hall, like you were looking for any reason not to be there. You told me you would call later, kissed me on the cheek and walked out. You never called. I found a note and the t-shirt I gave you when we were painting and you spilled pastel pink on yours. You folded it like you used to fold all my clothes and left it on my bed. Who knows why you couldn’t face me, I had known for weeks.
September 14th 2012
That song came on today in the grocery store. The one we danced too in your room. You told me your dad taught you how to slow dance before he left back when you were 13. I never admitted it but I had never slow danced till I met you. I cried in aisle 6. The doors unlocked if you want to come back.
November 3rd 2012
I went back to that art museum we snuck into last year. It was only 14 dollars but we were always looking for a thrill. I paid this time. It now costs 17. I found that painting that you liked and you were right, the rain on the sidewalk did make it perfect. I called you from a pay phone just to hear your voice. I’m sorry I couldn’t speak even after your third hello.
December 5th 2012
I found the mixtape you made me and listened to it until my roommates told me to turn it off because it was 3 AM. Anna said I’ve lost weight. You’re not coming back are you?
January 2nd 2013
I made a new years resolution. I know you hate those, I’m sorry. The candle you bought me finally burnt out, I went to buy a new one but they don’t make them anymore. I started locking the door again, but you know where to find the spare key.
February 17th 2013
Your sweatshirt doesn’t smell like home anymore. Maybe I should donate it to the mission. I heard you moved to Valdosta. I hope the weathers nice.
March 6th 2013
I couldn’t face you at your fathers funeral. I’m sorry. You know how much I loved him.
April 11th 2013
I went on a date and when I asked what their favorite book was, they said they didn’t read. The chicken tasted bad and I hated the way they said the word statistics. I haven’t called back since.
May 29th 2013
Someone said your name today and my knees didn’t buckle.
June 15th 2013
I painted flowers on my walls, and put away our pictures. My room felt different without your smile, but the frame no longer matched the décor.
July 12th 2013
I heard you got the job. Congrats. I hope all is well.
August 7th 2013
I am free. Thank you.